Musing during coronavirus

The cuckoo has been singing for a while; enough to evoke the thought of John Keats' Ode to a Nightingale. Yes, my heart ached as I was sitting with my steaming cup of tea and stared to the screen, my morning routine as usual.

"Which one do I pick first?" I asked myself. The rising global death toll, the shortage of medical supply, unemployment or the economic devastation? The whole world is collapsing due to the coronavirus pandemic. Danger, diagnosis, disease and death are the words that belong to my repertoire now-a-days. We all feel disarmed and helpless in this war, I kept thinking. The present and future both seemed frightening.

"Would you please shift to the other room, as I am about to start a conference call shortly," I woke up from my reverie hearing from my husband.

"What?" I said.

"I need to start my work; hope you haven't forgotten that I work from home now," he said.

"Oh, yes. I'll just shift my stuff to the living room," I said, picking up my laptop and accessories.

"Adaptability! Adaptability is the quality that distinguishes Homo Sapiens from dinosaurs," I mumbled. I was the only remote worker in the family as of now, but now my territory is invaded. That table placed near the internet router is something I thought I owned which has now become a coveted stuff. Well, this is just a small adjustment which I can easily do, I thought.

So, I set up a temporary den and settled down peacefully to continue my work. The mid-morning silence got interrupted only by the sound of my keyboard and occasional ping coming from my phone. Those pings cannot be ignored always, and I quickly skim through the messages. Queen Elizabeth has coronavirus- delete; drinking tea, taking vitamin C or black cumin seed will protect from coronavirus- delete; the virus is a biological weapon experiment- delete—list of deleted messages get longer. Then there are other messages providing important information about our neighbourhood or the city, which I would be lying if I said never affected me. After all, it really bothers one when there is a COVID-19 case reported in the mall they visit regularly; or in the next building to their home. Sometimes the discussion is on the proper way of social distancing; whether it is being maintained or not. It does matter. It's the human psyche that disallowed me to ignore everything.

Tensions do mount up while living abroad, thanks to the present fast communication system. Parents, extended family and friends live far away from me.  Most of the times a call from parents does not soothe the ears. "Your father is not listening and going to office….your brother has got a little cold….they said your shoes can bring the virus inside and so on"- all these never eased the tension but did the  opposite when the dear ones are away during the chaos. Younger cousins who are doctors are working without protective gears, I've heard.

Even if I could ignore those, it was very hard to ignore the call from my aunt, recently widowed, who broke into tears saying that she belonged to the vulnerable group as she had diabetes. "They have put up red, cross signs in 50 households in Mohammadpur. Please pray for me," sobbed my aunt. Unfortunately, she did not see the signs herself being housebound and could never tell me who put up those signs or what did it really mean.

What are we doing to the elderly people by constantly telling them that they were vulnerable? Aren't we diminishing their confidence, I thought.  And the rumours regarding the disease are killing them silently.

And then I heard it. The war that broke out in the other room should be stopped immediately, I thought as I leapt on my foot. I tried to detangle their four hands around the controller of the video game. "I want to play football with Bhaiya," said the younger one. "No, you little monkey, I want to play soccer but on my playstation. Give it back to me.  I keep on trying to settle them when my phone pings again. "It's boss mama (uncle)," said the little one though he still did not surrender to his brother. I start typing back in one hand while holding them by the other; almost strangling one and the other's foot dangling. A little shift in role– journalist turns referee, I thought. Finally, it was their father, the invader who became my saviour. His weaponry of crayons, chalk board, craft papers and my books enabled us to reach a ceasefire all fell quiet.

Poor children, I thought. All of a sudden they faced a major change in daily life. But at the same time I felt thankful that we are safe with a roof and food available to us. There are millions in my country and elsewhere suffering much more.

As the day rolled, I got engrossed in the mundane regularity of work and small breaks. A little chat with my elder son, a pre-teen, amazed me. We discussed different theories springing up during the harsh time of the pandemic we were facing. It has become universal and no one is safe, I said. "Yes, I feel the virus is a communist, Ma. See, it is infecting both the rich and poor, young and old, black and white people indiscriminately," he said. It may change the entire economic scenario in the world, he said. "True," I nodded. "Some people are saying the same."

And then if you perceive it from the religious point of view, then it is the wrath of God or his way to teach us lessons, I said. The environmentalists think that it is the way for Mother Nature to clean up pollution. "Although I don't feel like a scum on the earth's surface," I said and we both laughed. We talked about anything under the sun; ranging from veganism to possibility of online learning.

Throughout the day I worked hovering around the issues related to coronavirus– shutdown in different countries, rise in death tolls, lack of social awareness and even people touting a cure to the infection. Candidly speaking, it kind of pushed me to the brink of uncertainty and pessimism.

But I refused to yield to pessimism and tried to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I felt that we all gained something positive during this tough time. Relationships were nurtured as everyone took a pause from their regular race of life. Friends and colleagues we have not had contact for years were suddenly making queries of our wellbeing. Kindness took over empathy and people were helping each other everywhere. The virus has honed our resilience. It has given us the wit to tweak our motto- "divided we stand, united we fall"- but for a greater good, I thought on a lighter note.