Weapon of mass destruction, sorry distraction!

Published : 29 July 2011, 03:32 PM
Updated : 29 July 2011, 03:32 PM

A young Pakistani woman has given more joy to Indians than any visitor from Islamabad in a long while. The beautiful Hina Rabbani Khar came, saw – and conquered! She has flown back to her country which has fought three and a half wars with India. Yet millions of star-struck Indians are asking: Won't she come back? Alas nobody knows the answer!

Sorry for being sexist but the first thing I noticed about the Pakistani foreign minister was her pants instead of the standard salwar which she wore with her blue kurta when she stepped out of the plane at Palam airport. Then I caught her chewing gum. But the 34-year-old was denied a chance to chew up her 79-year-old counterpart S. M. Krishna by wily Indian diplomats who cancelled a joint media conference at the eleventh hour much to the disappointment of the Pakistani Foreign Office. Instead of ministers – India's oldest and Pakistan's youngest – the joint conference was addressed by foreign secretaries of the two countries.

But even Krishna couldn't help commenting on Khar's gorgeous looks. "Half of India, which is your age, looks towards you not just for your good looks but also dynamism and the fresh approach that you have brought to the table", he told the pretty woman from across the border over a meal. Krishna paid the compliment when Khar spoke of a "mindset change in Pakistan that wants friendship with India". Her remark became an immediate source of worry for over-protective Indian admirers who feared that she would be roasted alive by the Pakistani army and ISI for wearing her heart on her sleeve.

Khar mingled with her hosts in three stunning ensembles in a span of two days. She wore blue on the first day and cream and green on the second. I can well imagine Khar's brief to her talented designers back home: "I am a Muslim woman representing an Islamic country. So no body-hugging dresses please! And dupatta is a must. So what if I use the dupatta to highlight my hair rather than cover it!"

Like a good Muslim girl, Khar revealed nothing but her face, hands, feet and of course her locks. But she grabbed eyeballs like no Pakistani in living memory with the sole exception of probably Imran Khan when he first stepped on Indian soil in the late 70s or very early 80s. Her ensemble and accessories sent Indians into a tizzy. The classic South Sea pearl jewellery, Roberto Cavalli sunglasses and the bewitching smile of the photogenic, sorry telegenic minister became hot topics of discussion in homes and offices across India. But the accessory which hogged the limelight was her oversized Hermes Birkin bag.

Because everyone gaped at the bag which got more coverage than the peace talks, I had no option but to become an astute fact checker. I discovered that it's named after the iconic Jane Birkin [a 1960s English actress and singer] and is much sought after because it is available only on a limited basis, through a waiting list, apart from being very expensive. The Daily Mail put the price for the cheapest basic version at nearly $7,000. And it can cost as much as $100,000, thank you.

I also found out that Khar is enormously wealthy and a happily married woman with two sons a daughter. She is the niece of one of Pakistan Peoples' Party founders, Ghulam Mustafa Khar, who was the subject of a book, My Feudal Lord, written in 1991 by Tehmina Durrani, one of his seven wives. The foreign minister loves polo; the family owns plenty of horses. She also owns Polo Lounge, a classy restaurant in Lahore, has 20 Facebook fan clubs and is hailed as a fashionista by Wikipedia.

She also enjoys the distinction of being the first woman to present Pakistan's budget in 2009. But she refuses to pay income tax. Of course she is not alone – 25 other ministers in prime minister Yusuf Gilani's cabinet also don't pay income tax. They belong to the 'landed aristocracy' and get away by paying nominal agricultural tax on their huge income.

I thought that Khar was the perfect blend of beauty and brains because she kept saying every now and then that India-Pakistan dialogue should be "uninterrupted and uninterruptible". She came across as a peacenik with a silver tongue. Now I learn that she borrowed the phrase from Mani Shankar Aiyar, an old Pakistan hand from the foreign service and a former minister. Apparently, he got fed up watching Khar use his phrase frequently without attribution and gently announced his copyright over the expression when the two met.

"It's a phrase I have used often for the last 17 years. When we met over dinner, Khar admitted borrowing it from me", said Aiyar. Anyway most Indians are unlikely to remember or ponder over Khar's words. She will be remembered for her looks. And warmly welcomed whenever she revisits India.

————————————
S. N. M. Abdi is a consulting editor, writer, columnist and broadcaster from India.